Persian Hospitality: What to Expect When Visiting Local Homes
All You Need to Know about How Enter and Treat in a Persian Home
Iran is famous for its rich culture, history, and natural beauty, but according to visitors, its greatest treasure is something else: it’s the warmth and hospitality of its people. Hospitality is an essential trait in the Persian culture, so don’t be surprised if you receive many invitations to local homes during your trip. In this article, we’ll explore what to expect when visiting a Persian home so you can fully be prepared to experience Iranian hospitality firsthand.
Contents
Navigating Taarof and Invitations
Here’s a usual situation in Iran: you’re travelling to a new city and start chatting with a total stranger. After just a few minutes, this person invites you to his or her house and insists on having you as a guest.
If you’re a well-informed traveler, you may already have heard about taarof and know that you have to refuse to be certain the invitation is genuine (if you’re not familiar with taarof, we recommend you reading this article about Iranian customs and etiquette). However, your host may continue downplaying their invitation, saying something like “it’s nothing special”. Keep in mind that it is not just modesty but rather taarof in action and a way to show you respect and humility.
To figure out if the invitation is sincere, it’s better to refuse it at least two or three times in order to evaluate how insisting the person in front you is. Furthermore, even if you’re convinced of the sincerity of your host right from the beginning, it’s politer to refuse at least once to show some humility as well. It may be confusing at first, but you’ll get used to it!
Get Ready for Your Invitation
Here we are: you’ve accepted an invitation and are awaited at a Persian home. You may ask your host if they’d like you to bring a dessert or something else, as it is common in Europe, but in Iran the answer will always be negative. Don’t take their word for granted! Rather, if you want to thanks your host make sure to bring a little something to offer. The most common gesture is to bring “shirini” (sweets), chocolates, flowers, or even better, a small gift from your country if you have any. That will make a great first impression.
Most guests dress up nicely for “mehmooni” (gatherings) but as a traveler you might not have brought all your wardrobe with you. Simply put on something presentable and come as you are; your host will appreciate your presence more than your attire.
Note that if Iranians can be relaxed about punctuality, especially in bustling Tehran, it’s better to arrive on time for a formal invitation. Being a few minutes late is forgivable but don’t make your host wait for an hour, as it would be considered rude.
Entering a Persian Home: Shoes Off
When entering an Iranian home, don’t forget to remove your shoes at the entrance. Some people leave them outside the door, others remove them just inside the entry hall. Indeed, in Iran people don’t walk inside the house with shoes that have been worn outside for sanitary reasons (many even change their clothes in order not to bring dirt from clothes worn outside the house). Your host may offer slippers as most home keep a pair for their guests, but it’s also fine to walk around the house barefoot.
Just pay attention to an important detail: Iranian have separate slippers they use specifically for the bathroom. It is considered unclean to wear the same slippers in both the house and the bathroom, so be sure to leave them at the door and use the dedicated bathroom slippers.
Complimenting the House
Iranian pay great attention to their interior. They always keep it clean and tidy as receiving guests at home is central to their culture. When entering a house, it may be a nice gesture to sincerely compliment your host about their house. However, remain respectful of their private space and do not enter rooms unless invited.
While admiring the house, avoid praising specific items whether in the home or your host’s personal belongings. In Iranian culture, such admiration may be interpreted as a request, and your host may feel obligated to offer the item as a gift; another form of taarof. If you’re in such situation, do your best to kindly decline the offer.
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A Place of Honor for the Guest
In Iranian culture, guests are seen as friends of God and are thus treated with the utmost respect. That’s why when you’re invited to a Persian home, your host will do everything to make you feel comfortable and satisfied. It makes no difference whether you’re in a rich household or in with a rural family in a small village.
Usually, everything is ready ahead of the guest’s arrival and when this latter arrives, he or she is guided to the living room to enjoy some fruits, nuts and tea with a casual conversation. Most invitations to Persian homes includes a meal, so you’ll quickly be invited to sit at the table or around the “sofreh” (a tablecloth spread on the floor). If you’re sitting at a table, expect to be offered the best seat.
As a mark of respect or kindness you may want to give a hand serving and bringing the dishes, it’s best to refrain. In Iran, especially during a first visit, it’s best not to help washing the dishes or else, as it may be an embarrassment for your host. You can kindly offer to help, but respect your host’s decision to decline it.
Expect an Abundance of Food
Persian hospitality is best experienced at the dining table, where guests are treated to a feast. Iranians love to share food with their guests, and a visit to their home often means tasting a variety of home cooked Persian dishes. You will taste the best ghormeh sabzi, fessenjan, kashk-e bademjoon and other delicacies in Persian homes.
Hosts usually take great pride in their cooking skills, and it’s polite to try a bit of everything and not being picky. Complimenting the food is of course highly appreciated, and your hosts will insist on serving you more. Accept it as much as you can, even in small portions, as a way to show your appreciation. That will for sure make your host happy. Try finishing your plate as in Iran leaving food may be seen as a waste or even worst, may be interpreted by your guests as your dislike for the food.
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Leaving a Persian Home
Leaving a Persian home often comes with its own ritual. Your host will never explicitly say it’s time to leave, so you’ll need to sense when to bring the visit to an end. Usually, it’s common to sit again after the meal to share tea and conversation. After a while, it can be reasonable to inform your guest that you’re soon going to leave. Depending on how much they insist, you may want to stay a bit more and reiterate your intention to leave a bit later. It’s also not uncommon that they’ll offer you to stay overnight, which is common in Iranian culture. However, it’s best to politely decline as it may be part of taarof.
Upon leaving, your host may offer you a small gift, whether it’d be sweets or even handicrafts. This is a way for your host to give a memorable goodbye and leaving a lasting memory. Accepting the gift with gratitude will show your appreciation of your host’s kindness.
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